I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.
I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.
Status
I'm a little bit drink.
I'm a little bit drink.
I'm not single, I'm just romantically challenged.
I'm not single, I'm just romantically challenged.
It's not that I can't stop being single, it's that I haven't found anyone that's been up to the challenge.
It's not that I can't stop being single, it's that I haven't found anyone that's been up to the challenge.
Marriage is like a pack of cards. In the beginning, it was hearts and a diamond, now all I'm wanting in my hand is a club and a spade.
Marriage is like a pack of cards. In the beginning, it was hearts and a diamond, now all I'm wanting in my hand is a club and a spade.
Onions make me sad. A lot of people don't realize that.
Onions make me sad. A lot of people don't realize that.
Ugh, I'm so full, who wants dessert? Me.
Ugh, I'm so full, who wants dessert? Me.
You can't be real. May I pinch you to see if I'm dreaming.
You can't be real. May I pinch you to see if I'm dreaming.
Always hears your cute and you’re so sweet so what I'm good enough to be your friend but nothing more? Be honest for once and tell me what’s wrong with me.
Always hears your cute and you’re so sweet so what I'm good enough to be your friend but nothing more? Be honest for once and tell me what’s wrong with me.
Dear teacher, I talk to everyone, so moving my seat won’t help. Sincerely, student
Dear teacher, I talk to everyone, so moving my seat won’t help. Sincerely, student
Don't make me your option, when I have made you my priority.
Don't make me your option, when I have made you my priority.
Every time I drink I get awesome.
Every time I drink I get awesome.